A Starbucks episode….wow…
Ξ December 17th, 2008 | → 10 Comments | ∇ Uncategorized |
I love working in my local Starbucks, because there really is nothing like living a social experiment each day listening to people and loving people even if it is through just sitting and listening to other people, but I just witnessed and event that I wish I could tell most of the Christian world.
A lady just walked into the Starbucks and got the attention of the barista working the drive-through and handed him a Lee Strobel book, telling him that she bought him the book and wanted him to read it and then after he was done reading it to throw it away or give it to someone else it did not matter. And she reminded him that he told her something in the drive through that made her think of the book and she wanted him to read it.
Well, the immediate answer of the guy was, “I’ve already read it.”
she responded, “Oh well did you like it?”
after a short but awkward pause he said,”Well, he makes an OK argument, but your assuming that I am not already a Christian!”
And with that the lady felling a little embarrassed told him then he could give the book to someone else, and went as fast as she could out the door with out running into a dead sprint, heh.
This is a perfect example how the church has forgotten how to relate with the world that we find ourselves in. This well meaning lady, thought she was doing such a great thing for Christ by expecting a book to do all the work that the example of Christ wanted his followers to do. She did not have a relationship with this guy, she only knew him from the drive-through of a Starbucks, and she had not earned the right for him to listen to anything she said. It was a modified version of handing out a tract that “explains” the gospel and expects a sheet of paper to develop relationship with them and then some how the Holy Spirit will take over for them, and the problem of the Christian ghetto continues, huddled in the corners and seem to be getting smaller and smaller.
I then over heard the guy telling a co-worker that he used to attend a church that ran him out when he started to get serious about his discipleship and asked hard questions about Jesus and the Bible. And when the hard questions started to go past the “tried and true answers” he no longer felt like anyone wanted to join him in his traveling discovery of the Jesus he read about and how the words of that man/God are lived out and misunderstood by the world and his followers.
Please I beg of all of you, do not expect a billboard, tract, or Roman Road to replace what God desires of all of you…. build relationships and develop community!!!! Just do it and sit back and watch God and you start to develop community, relationships, and presence in this new way to be human.
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How about a touchdown Jesus?
I just want to say, I agree completely that in order for us to be a witness, we need to be a part of the life of a person. Without relationship, we are talking at people, not with them.
Our church is successful when we engage with the marginalized. We create a community by hanging out with them, supplying some of their needs and just getting to know them.
I think that is what it means to be in the world, but not of it.
Great observation DG!
As a dedicated tract-passer-outer, (with 4 conversions since Sept) I have to disagree. Especially if you are working with the marginalized. Time is short and the gospel is precious. There is not always time to develop a relationship, to earn some right to be heard. You plant a seed, hopefully. It might develop later. It might not. The seed could be a tract, could be a conversation and a cup of coffee, but by all means, tell them about Jesus NOW; tomorrow will be too late.
I think it is so important for us to remember that God uses and calls us all differently to serve different sorts of needs. Some people are looking for community and a relationship, so that approach is very effective with them. Others find that awkward and off-putting and are more likely to take a book home and read it than they are to join a group. Sure, this woman’s attempt to follow what she thought backfired. Or did it? That kid wound up sharing his story of being hurt with the church with the people he works with and who knows what will come of that. Perhaps this woman was doing exactly what she was called to do by taking what I am sure was an embarrassing hit for the team. Gods ways are not our ways…so I’m guessing that our interpretations of His actions are not His either.
Yeah Aaron that is just the place that we disagree. And I’m OK with that, of course. I still believe that while God can use all things and does to bring about the Kingdom in the hearts and lives of others and ourselves, I still believe there is so much more to disciples than conversions. If we trully are called to allow God work through us and bring about “students” of Christ which is my understanding of the term “disciples”, if conversion is all we are seeking then we are expecting an immediate relationship to form between an individual and God. Now, while relationships can form immediatly I believe that in most people in the world today discipleship needs time to develop way before conversion occurs and, of course, a time of the same afterwards.
I liken it to Wesly’s understanding of sanctification. While in some cases it can happen in this lifetime in certian lives (& maybe in some cultures/demographics a tract is all that it takes perhaps since the lives they are currently living have been so difficult and demanding that they are grasping at straws or Holy Spirit has been soaking them up with previenant grace so much so that a tract or Roman road (even if the texts are removed from the intended the narritive of the author) that they are willing to find and recognise hope even in a tract. And to this I join you and anyone in celebration of a life excited to be welcomed in relationship with the ultimate relationship of Trinity, but I still believe it is not the most effective for the burbs and middle class or postmonderns that are becoming greater and greater in the popular thinking and lived out lives in this world.
And I also believe that a conversion was never meant to be only in an individal person level. I know this does not describe you Aaron, so all too often Christians who use tracts expect the heavy living of discipleship to continue without interpersonal relations/community (in other words “the church”). Nothing I believe is more effoctive than relationship and discipleship! I believe that a tracts purpose is bring about conversion and that while a necessary step is only a small part of discipleship. I just believe in a postmodern mindset we must allow for relationships to encourage wresteling and questions and experience with God, Grace, forgiveness, etc…
And you know how much I love ya Aaron and in your faithfulness to our King I can find very few with the passion and love for God and others that I respect more than you! Thanks so much. I’m honored that you read this blog,
I appologise if there are typos or awkard grammar in this comment, I did the whole post with my phone
Joan:
Thank you so much for stopping by and reading my rarely updated blog, heh heh. I am excited about your book and can’t wait to read it someday and I would be honored to possibly interview you someday for the Praxis Podcast if your willing.
Your comment is of course one direction that the story could be taken. That God wanted the event to occur even if the sweet well intended woman had to take one for the team. But, one could just as well have said God can use our mistakes too.
I still think where the most effective discipleship occurred in the story was between him and his co-workers where relationship and community existed. I.e. The very things I am lifting up in the story I brought to the blog. Just as the community you have with your husband was in constant discussion with the community you had with those that were liked minded with you while you were not a disciple of Christ. And, then the challenge and complete transistion you have to live through with your relations and community.
And, while I can agree that maybe God desired for her to take one for the team I feel is it more important and more “effective” to promote being those in relationship with the guy that he trusts and discussed his chalenges, hopes, & dreams. Instead of forming no relationship and promoting very little or no sacrifice involved in side by side discipleship.
Again thanks so much for your comments! I can’t express my gratitude.
Again the typo disclosure goes for this post, as well.
D.G. Would love to pull this apart with you in more depth. I agree that the discipleship happened in the community, but it was the misstep that opened the dialog. It is like an addict who gets a DWI and is sent into recovery. The DWI is both a blessing and a curse.
I actually think it is a fascinating parable–may even wind its way into my book if you have no objection. This is kind of story that makes me think about the Babylonians or Judas and others that betrayed or harmed the chosen, yet were at some level doing the will of God. I look forward to following your posts and would love do an interview on your podcast. My email is joanpball@gmail.com if you want to catch up a little more directly.
Great connecting with you…
J
I’m not sure we disagree, DG. There has to be discipleship. Some relationships are easy and quick, some are not and take years. Some conversions are instantaneous, some gradual. It can’t happen outside the Church– you have to meet together, fellowship. I do that, too, but I am also aware that it can happen right at the first contact, and I believe we have to offer it.
If the relationships you are willing to form are honest, then they will handle it (mostly) if you offer Christ on Day 1. I have a guy who has been rejecting it for over two years.
Be open. I think the poor and marginalized particularly will accept it quickly. That’s where i think Joan’s comment is apt– different ways in different places with different people. I am well aware that I could probably not do much evangelism in a “regular” UM church…
I’m just wondering if the barista wasn’t a bit presumptuous. Maybe the woman wasn’t trying to evangelize him, but had responded with a book that she felt was relevant to her previous conversation with him. Could it be that the book was her attempt at establishing an ongoing relationship and conversation with him?
Maybe she had questions about the book and wanted him to be able to respond. Just a thought.
I have several of those ongoing relationships and conversations going with people in places where I routinely go. One of them gave me a copy of The Shack. I didn’t assume they thought I needed to become a Christian.
I sometimes feel there is an effort for we as Christians to save the entire world with the message of the Gospel. So we run from person to person, plating seeds as wide, far and as fast as we can. Not a bad idea on the surface in my opinion. The issue I have is that God already saved the entire world. In this vein I am told that we are to be like the planter in the parable of the planter sowing seed on all sorts of soil. Again, good ideas at first glance; plant as many seeds as you can and leave it to God to grow the seeds. But in that parable it is GOD who is the farmer throwing seed, not humans. Jesus only had deep relationships with a small group of people and not an entire nation. Perhaps we are to develop deep relationships with a few and not short/shallow relationships with many. Maybe that is why the Christian life is hard, it requires us to say no to some really good ideas (throw as much seed as we can out there) in order to say yes to the really great ideas (nurture a few deep relationships).
I am curious to know how many relationships we can have at that deep level. Malcolm Gladwell writes people have a limit of the amount of personal relationships they can have: 150.
You can probably only have 7 deep relationships at one time. I hear that number, and it feels right. Maybe more depending on your energy, maybe less. Since God does the work, we just get to play along, we broadcast seeds. Sometimes the sower and reaper are the same person. Sometimes not.
Peter’s sermon on Pentecost–does it tell us anything? How many relationships did he have there? What community was he building. DG, can we have a thread on community? My bias: I am curious why people think community is what Jesus is about. ANyway. Awesome stuff, thanks for all the ideas!